20 March, 2011

Secure Daughters and Confident Sons, by Glenn T. Stanton

Secure Daughters and Confident Sons: How Parents Guide Their Children into Authentic Masculinity and Femininity is authored by Glenn T. Stanton, director for Family Formation Studies at Focus on the Family here in Colorado Springs. In this book, he bucks the tide of today’s growing belief that both Mama and Daddy aren’t necessary for a child’s wellbeing and growth and that having only one or even a Mom and a Mom (as in a lesbian relationship) are just as beneficial to a child’s maturity if not perhaps even better than heterosexual parenting. He tackles this controversial subject with gusto as he implores that gender matters in a hugely socio-economic way!

The reader will encounter stories, statistics, and Biblical insight which will establish the essentialness of having both Mama and Daddy in the home - not just for the family’s stability, but so that the child is able to be nurtured in the fullest and best sense through the strengths that each gender provides to become a well rounded adult. He details how a father’s physical and action oriented masculinity complements a mother’s nurturing and protective femininity. It is obvious that the author delights in the handiwork of God displayed through the differences of each gender.

Mr. Stanton also directs parents to be aware of the differing needs of their children based upon their gender. Even though he writes that parents need to be cautious about “boxing” their children into a specific mold (i.e., boys shouldn’t want to cook or do anything girly, or girls shouldn’t want to play sports, etc.), he underlines the core of how God created boys and girls specifically and how these differences ought to present themselves in our parenting strategies as we seek to understand our children’s needs. He writes that a boy needs to make a difference, to save the world (even if it incurs destroying something in the process!), to be innovative, to be honorable, and to be respected by those around him (this one caused me to think of the book Love & Respect). In regards to a girl’s needs, he writes that she needs intimacy, community, modesty, security, to be viewed as the most important person in the world to a man, and then to also be able to see herself as capable so that she does not succumb to a victim mentality. As a mother to both a son and a daughter, this book gave me much food for thought. It was very helpful!

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from Waterbrook Publishers. I was not required to write a positive review even though it is possible that my husband might encounter the author in the halls today at work. The opinions I have expressed are my own and have no bearing upon my husband’s ability to cut the author’s royalty check. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

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